I have never ever taken my ability to get out there and run for granted. Running has gotten me through all of the ups and downs of my life, including the death of both my parents and other loved ones, bad diagnoses from friends and family and the letting go of the job I had for 35 years. it has been a constant in my life for many years, while other parts of my life have come and gone.
I started running when Kseniya was a baby, just to get out of the house because for a while I was a stay at home mom and I needed an outlet. I have been running ever since with a brief pause for the aerobic craze.
I have learned to love running for the sheer joy of it and not care too much about how fast I run or for how long. I have a rule to never leave anyone behind - if I invite someone along and they are slower than me, I stay with them. If someone is having a bad day, I stay with them too.
I have done about 35 marathons and many 1/2 marathons as well. Okay so I am always happy when I finish a 1/2 marathon in under two hours or a marathon in under 4 hours. I still smile when I think of my PR in a marathon in 1999 - 3:35:34 in St. George. Me, Paula and Billy completed that and when I got to mile 25 and saw the elapsed time, I cried. I never thought I could run that fast. The most memorable moment that day (besides mile 25) was when Paula dropped the F Bomb...."only two fucking miles to go" she said, much to the surprise of my son who must have been about 19 years old at the time, and an old man running along side us who could hardly believe that this thin, innocent looking blond could use such language. We talked about it for a long time afterwards - the time when Paula dropped the F -bomb. Paula and I qualified for our first Boston that year. I have to be realistic that I probably will never do this time again but I will not give up hope in improving and coming in under 4 hours. And part of me believes I still have a sub 3:40 marathon in me. Hope springs eternal and keeps me planning on what I will do differently "next time".
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| Boston 2000 - Paula and I looking good. |
My most memorable marathon was the slowest one I have ever done, with my friend Bob, who died from ALS, and my friends Tom and Paula. It was Boston and it took us 6:12 to complete. But it was his last and I have written about it elsewhere so won't go into it here. Suffice it to say, it was a testament to the power of the mind and the human spirit (I guess that sounds a little like a cliche but it is true).
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| Boston 2007 - Bob's last marathon |
Running has remained a constant on my life for the past 33 years. I refuse to believe that I have to quit despite my age and despite my aches and pains. My best running buddy Jack the dog is slowing down (just like I am) but today I promised him that I would be there for him even if he could only go for a mile. He is always there for me no matter how cold, hot or wet, it is or how early in the morning. I owe him a lot. He has run as much as 13 miles with me and he is still eager to go but he does get tired quicker. He is almost 12 years old. He listens to my conversation without judgement and every once in a while licks my hand in thanks. He is so happy to get out there that he makes me run even on days like today when I didn't want to because I had already run 13 with Suzanne the day before.
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| Jack and I last winter sometime |
I have run in many different states even if it is just around parking lots at hotels. There are friends that I only saw at conferences that I would meet and run with in different places - like in New Orleans, stepping over drunks on Bourbon street and with the smell of urine and other excrement stinging my nose. I have run in Florida where it was so humid it felt like running in a warm shower. I had to through away my running shoes after that trip because they never dried out. I love running in the humidity of my little town where I grew up, when I can see wildlife and sometimes run with friends that I have grown up with. The simple shorter runs are usually the best.
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| some Michigan running buddies |
I love running with my kids and have run several marathons with Bill and two 1/2 marathons with Kseniya and a few 10ks with all my kids. I have run a 5k with baby Des.
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| Kseniya and I finishing the Austin 1/2 marathon in 2011 |
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| Bill's first marathon 1996? He was 14. Dan and Kseniya were there to be athletic supporters |
Today I did need to go despite my sore legs. I had a mammogram a week ago and got a call saying they saw something and I needed additional views of the right "girl". I wasn't worried at all because it sounded like it was just a lymph node but still....running today with Jack helped keep it all in perspective. I knew I would accept whatever I had because what else could I do.
I was humbled to get to the waiting room in the mammogram area and see women like me, some younger and some older, all in their over sized hospital gowns with "everything from the waist up" removed. Some of them, I could tell, already had bad news - they had the cancer haircut and the pale color of not enough red blood cells - destroyed from the chemotherapy.
The tech was kind and showed me what they were concerned about on the previous film. I was ready to protest if they told me that I would have to wait for the results until the doctor read them and did a report (the typical scenario). As it turned out, she consulted with the radiologist, while I sat there with my possibly defective right girl, and "put in a few good words". She came back and said it was just a lymph node and all was well.
I dodged another bullet although I felt more vulnerable and realized, yes it could happen to me.
Tomorrow I will once again run and be thankful. I will continue to run until I can't. And I will be there for Jack the dog.
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