an afternoon at the cemetary
Yesterday Barbara Jean and I decided to go visit my mom and dad at the Rockland Cemetary where their ashes are buried and mingling together in this beautiful, well kept place that houses many of our old friends and relatives. Years ago, when my grandma and grandpa were our only close relatives down here, my mom, sister and I would bring some beer and coffee and drink a beer with grandpa and some coffee with grandma. We hadn't yet had a "crabby" with mama even though she has been down here for two years now. Our dad didn't drink (hadn't since he was 38 years old - but did his share beforehand) but I am sure he wouldn't mind if we did.
Crabby juice is just whiskey and pepsi. Barb has "crabby cups" that are nalgene bottles (yes I know they are not supposed to be good for you now) she got from the mill where she worked before she retired and before they closed down the mill. She used to bring my mom one every night when she was alive. We prepared three - one for each of us and one from ma and headed down there with a Chicago Cubs gnome (my mom was a big Cubby fan).
We sat in front of my mom and dad's grave and sipped on the crabby, reminiscing about our parents. My sister forgot the ice but it still tasted good in that quiet green cemetary. Al, the caretaker of the cemetary was mowing the grass and we decided, rather than dumping the third crabby on my mom's ashes, we should invite Al to have some with us. I don't really know him as he is way younger than I am and I wasn't sure if he would take us up on our offer. I had spoken to him a few times when my morning run took me to the cemetary and he was there. Even if he didn't want to join us, I knew he would not complain about our drinking with our parents.
Al was more than happy to sit with us for a minute and have a crabby toast to my mom and all the others resting there. He has been mowing the grass for 12 hours already...it's a big cemetary. "I always want to make it look pretty for the fourth of July and on Memorial Day", he said. He told us how he was paid from cemetary donations and he didn't want to take more money for the job than he needed to - so he tried to be very efficient with his time.
As Al sat there and sipped the lukewarm crabby juice with us, he told us about the cemetary and how it used to be part of the Lake Superior shoreline for Lake. As the water receded, the cemetary was extended. The ground is mostly sandy and rocky he said, because it was lake front at one time. He pointed out several trees that he had been trying to save but that would have to come down soon. He really did his best to save the old trees as long as he could but some were on their last limbs. He explained how they would cut the tree down bit by bit and use ropes to be sure it didn't crash down on any of the tombstones.
"I tried to move away from Rockland several times", he said. "But I always had to come back. I love it here. My wife and I don't need a lot of things". We knew that Al's wife is a pharmacist and on several occasions she would deliver medications to my sister's house on her way home from work - like him, she is a down to earth, kind person who is willing to go out of her way to help.
Al sat with us for a while and we asked him to take our picture - it's cool how his shadow appears in it too. Symbolic of something I am sure. Maybe how we are all a part of each other and something bigger?
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Al talked with us for a while longer, but needed to get back to his work - he still will need another day - about 6 hours, to finish his job, making the cemetary look good for the people who will come to visit their loved ones. So many will never know how much time and care went in to making this cemetary look great. Too often we don't think of those who do these seemingly menial jobs and take them for granted. There's not much glamor in mowing a cemetary but Al, took such pride and care in his work and it showed. Before he got back on his mower, we took his picture.
I love how small town people are so accepting. Al didn't think it weird that we were drinking crabby juice with our dead mom. He just accepted this without comment and joined us on this beautiful day in a beautiful place that is home to a lot of people who made us what we are before they left us. God bless people like him for what they do behind the scenes.
Crabby juice is just whiskey and pepsi. Barb has "crabby cups" that are nalgene bottles (yes I know they are not supposed to be good for you now) she got from the mill where she worked before she retired and before they closed down the mill. She used to bring my mom one every night when she was alive. We prepared three - one for each of us and one from ma and headed down there with a Chicago Cubs gnome (my mom was a big Cubby fan).
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| My mom and dad's grave - the gnome and the crabby juice. |
We sat in front of my mom and dad's grave and sipped on the crabby, reminiscing about our parents. My sister forgot the ice but it still tasted good in that quiet green cemetary. Al, the caretaker of the cemetary was mowing the grass and we decided, rather than dumping the third crabby on my mom's ashes, we should invite Al to have some with us. I don't really know him as he is way younger than I am and I wasn't sure if he would take us up on our offer. I had spoken to him a few times when my morning run took me to the cemetary and he was there. Even if he didn't want to join us, I knew he would not complain about our drinking with our parents.
Al was more than happy to sit with us for a minute and have a crabby toast to my mom and all the others resting there. He has been mowing the grass for 12 hours already...it's a big cemetary. "I always want to make it look pretty for the fourth of July and on Memorial Day", he said. He told us how he was paid from cemetary donations and he didn't want to take more money for the job than he needed to - so he tried to be very efficient with his time.
As Al sat there and sipped the lukewarm crabby juice with us, he told us about the cemetary and how it used to be part of the Lake Superior shoreline for Lake. As the water receded, the cemetary was extended. The ground is mostly sandy and rocky he said, because it was lake front at one time. He pointed out several trees that he had been trying to save but that would have to come down soon. He really did his best to save the old trees as long as he could but some were on their last limbs. He explained how they would cut the tree down bit by bit and use ropes to be sure it didn't crash down on any of the tombstones.
"I tried to move away from Rockland several times", he said. "But I always had to come back. I love it here. My wife and I don't need a lot of things". We knew that Al's wife is a pharmacist and on several occasions she would deliver medications to my sister's house on her way home from work - like him, she is a down to earth, kind person who is willing to go out of her way to help.
Al sat with us for a while and we asked him to take our picture - it's cool how his shadow appears in it too. Symbolic of something I am sure. Maybe how we are all a part of each other and something bigger?
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| Al taking a break with us |
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