challenging the comfort zone, #3
For some reason I wanted to knit a pair socks. My mom was a great sock knitter (and a great knitter in general) and I wish I would have appreciated her homemade socks, mittens and hats more than I did. My sister also could knit socks. I always thought that I would be unable to master using all those knitting needles at the same time, so never tried. Until recently. Ironically, my sister, my daughter and I all decided we wanted to knit socks. I didn't tell my daughter (Kseniya) that I, too decided to take up the challenge, because I wanted to surprise her with a pair at Thanksgiving.
I found a pattern and some yarn. The pattern called for 5 knitting needles, which surprised my sister, who said she and my mom only used four. But I was determined. I watched a You Tube video on how to cast on to five needles. I still ended up starting several times, tearing out my stitches and starting over - swearing a lot! I was not having fun. I went to bed and dreamed about the socks. I had a hard time manipulating 5 needles at a time and my shoulders got sore. I had a bad attitude and decided I must somehow make myself like this knitting on 5 f*** ing needles and embrace it!
Actually, making a sock is not that hard. You just follow the directions no matter how weird it seems. However the needles kept getting caught in my shirt sleeves. I kept pulling the stitches off the needle and then I lost track of how many rounds I had done. It was just not very relaxing.
When I got to the part about turning the heel, I was paralyzed with fear. "You can do it", my dead mother encouraged me. I text messaged my sister and said "I can't". She sent back "You can do it, Donna Raye!" So I turned that damn heel with encouragement from the dead and the living and you tube. I was so proud of myself. But I still had to face the gusset... (I kept calling it a gasket). After I asked Bruce what a gusset was anyway, I finally understood I picked up the number of prescribed stitches and proceeded to the toe of the sock. I could see my mistakes - for one thing I found out that I had knit the entire sock inside out but learned from my friends on the internet t that was OK -and my sister in law always makes one mistake on her quilts on purpose because "only God is perfect".
I asked my sister in law who is one of the most talented people I know, how to not knit socks inside out. "I can't knit socks on four needles", she said. I was astounded because this is a woman who can make sweaters, can crochet and has award winning quilts. She can build bookcases, and put down hardwood floor, make great grits and home made soup. I bet she can churn butter too! I guess I am not the only person who is afraid of the sock. I also asked a woman in my church knitting group, who makes cable sweaters, baby hats, blankets and many other things. She said "Well I knit one sock once just to see if I could do it". She too, was intimidated by the sock. This made me more determined to master the task. Why are socks so challenging even to the experts? What, philosophically speaking, does this all mean?
When I finished one sock, I was elated. But alas, I had one more to do. I thought about finding a person with one leg to donate it to or using it for a Christmas stocking for the friend of Dan's who was coming for Christmas. However the knitting of socks became somehow symbolic to me of not giving up...of proving my worth. I was part Finnish, dammit and I had SISU!
So I cast on, knit, undid, cast on, knit, undid for an entire evening till I got that damn second sock going. I vowed I would never knit a pair of socks again...you can buy nice smart wool socks for less than the yarn and my time had cost. The second sock did go much faster although "mistakes were made"....but only God is perfect, right? I dreamed about this second sock too and got up at 430 one morning to make the gasket - or gusset. But I could see the end in sight!
I finished them today, at around 9 AM. I was happy and felt accomplished. Knitting socks made up for many of my other inadequacies - not being assertive enough, not being able to dance, being short and stubby, not having what it takes to take people into the future, etc, etc...everything I have failed at in my life was erased! I was able to knit socks!
Anyway, I determined that sock knitting is like marathon running. You get done with one and you never ever want to do it again. But no sooner are you done, then you start thinking, "next time I will use smaller needles, make the toe shorter, train harder, etc.
Just know how much someone loves you if they give you home made socks. And know that you should persevere against all obstacles Nothing is impossible - it just might take longer. And not every sock is perfect.
I found a pattern and some yarn. The pattern called for 5 knitting needles, which surprised my sister, who said she and my mom only used four. But I was determined. I watched a You Tube video on how to cast on to five needles. I still ended up starting several times, tearing out my stitches and starting over - swearing a lot! I was not having fun. I went to bed and dreamed about the socks. I had a hard time manipulating 5 needles at a time and my shoulders got sore. I had a bad attitude and decided I must somehow make myself like this knitting on 5 f*** ing needles and embrace it!
Actually, making a sock is not that hard. You just follow the directions no matter how weird it seems. However the needles kept getting caught in my shirt sleeves. I kept pulling the stitches off the needle and then I lost track of how many rounds I had done. It was just not very relaxing.
When I got to the part about turning the heel, I was paralyzed with fear. "You can do it", my dead mother encouraged me. I text messaged my sister and said "I can't". She sent back "You can do it, Donna Raye!" So I turned that damn heel with encouragement from the dead and the living and you tube. I was so proud of myself. But I still had to face the gusset... (I kept calling it a gasket). After I asked Bruce what a gusset was anyway, I finally understood I picked up the number of prescribed stitches and proceeded to the toe of the sock. I could see my mistakes - for one thing I found out that I had knit the entire sock inside out but learned from my friends on the internet t that was OK -and my sister in law always makes one mistake on her quilts on purpose because "only God is perfect".
I asked my sister in law who is one of the most talented people I know, how to not knit socks inside out. "I can't knit socks on four needles", she said. I was astounded because this is a woman who can make sweaters, can crochet and has award winning quilts. She can build bookcases, and put down hardwood floor, make great grits and home made soup. I bet she can churn butter too! I guess I am not the only person who is afraid of the sock. I also asked a woman in my church knitting group, who makes cable sweaters, baby hats, blankets and many other things. She said "Well I knit one sock once just to see if I could do it". She too, was intimidated by the sock. This made me more determined to master the task. Why are socks so challenging even to the experts? What, philosophically speaking, does this all mean?
When I finished one sock, I was elated. But alas, I had one more to do. I thought about finding a person with one leg to donate it to or using it for a Christmas stocking for the friend of Dan's who was coming for Christmas. However the knitting of socks became somehow symbolic to me of not giving up...of proving my worth. I was part Finnish, dammit and I had SISU!
So I cast on, knit, undid, cast on, knit, undid for an entire evening till I got that damn second sock going. I vowed I would never knit a pair of socks again...you can buy nice smart wool socks for less than the yarn and my time had cost. The second sock did go much faster although "mistakes were made"....but only God is perfect, right? I dreamed about this second sock too and got up at 430 one morning to make the gasket - or gusset. But I could see the end in sight!
I finished them today, at around 9 AM. I was happy and felt accomplished. Knitting socks made up for many of my other inadequacies - not being assertive enough, not being able to dance, being short and stubby, not having what it takes to take people into the future, etc, etc...everything I have failed at in my life was erased! I was able to knit socks!
 |
| Holy shit, I made a two socks! |
 |
| Just know, if someone makes you socks, they really, really love you! |
Just know how much someone loves you if they give you home made socks. And know that you should persevere against all obstacles Nothing is impossible - it just might take longer. And not every sock is perfect.
Comments