the cookie store
When my kids were little, I worked four ten hour shifts so I had every Friday off. I started a tradition with Kseniya when she was a baby, of taking her to "the cookie store"on Fridays. It wasn't really a specific store, but any coffee house or bakery that sold cookies - mostly chocolate chip cookies. Sometimes it was the now defunct Cottonwood Mall where we got a Mrs. Field's cookie. That was Billy's favorite. Kseniya liked the hot dog on a stick place. Dan liked the pretzel place where you could get a hot pretzel slathered in butter. None of it was healthy stuff but I am happy to say it didn't ruin my kids and they all now eat very healthy diets and exercise as well.
Kseniya and I did this until she was in first grade and I no longer had Fridays off. By then Billy was born and he became my cookie store date. By the time we had Dan and he was old enough, he and I went to the cookie store every Friday until he was in school five days/week.
The kids grew up, as kids do, and I eventually had to work five days a week. I always missed those trips to the cookie store where I could sit with one of my children and give them my undivided attention and we would talk about whatever they wanted to talk about. Starbucks wasn't around then so it was basic coffee and cookies and nothing fancy. When my mom visited me, she would also come with us. I miss my mom's visits more than I ever thought possible.
This week, I have been lucky enough to spend a lot of time with our sweet grandson Desmond. I have been taking him for walks every day - first in the morning with Jack the dog, who walks protectively right next to the stroller, and then later on in the day to the park where we swing on the swings and play on the slide. I slide down the slide with him even though there are a bunch of young moms staring at me disapprovingly - or maybe they are jealous cause I, at my grandmotherly age, can slide down the slide without breaking any of my "fragile" bones - and enjoy it.
Today I thought I would take Des for the usual walk to the park. But I wanted to do something different and I suddenly remembered....it's Friday and Desmond should get his first trip to the cookie store. So we went to Pierre's Bakery and I got him the biggest chocolate cookie they had. We shared it and he wore more of it than he ate. It just made me so damn happy to take that sweet little boy in the stroller to the cookie store and not have anything else in the world to do that would be more important. How lucky is that?
Some things in life are just meant to be. Even if they seem unfair. I am so glad to be able to spend time with Desmond and so lucky to have a good relationship with all our kids. I figured I would be working till Des was at least 4 and then I could spend time with him, but I have been able to spend much of his first year watching him grow and learning how to become a grandma. I am lucky that Scarlett trusts us to watch him all day and that she and Billy realize the importance of grandparents in his upbringing. Des is one lucky kid because he had a lot of family on both sides who love him and enjoy spending time with him.
I feel so close to my own mom when I am around Desmond. I couldn't relate to her so much as a mom when I became one because I could only imagine and be grateful for all the things she did for us when we were growing up. However I saw the love she exhibited with my children and the sheer joy she felt at spending time with them...like when she came out for Kseniya's first birthday and pushed her 6 blocks uphill to visit me at work. And how she stayed with her when Billy was born and came and visited us and helped me with so many things from washing walls and learning how to make french braids. I wish I could talk to her about being a grandma and tell her what a good one she was and how I now understand how cool it is to have your job just be to play with your grand kids and just to love them. I understand her sadness every time she left and her excitement when we were coming to visit her - infrequently as it was. She taught me a lot about being a grandma. I wish she was here to see Desmond and be a great grandma. I wish my mom in law Jeanne could also enjoy him - and my dad and father in law too.
I would not trade the past year for anything - despite it's ups and downs. Time with loved ones and growing babies is more important than anything. .
Kseniya and I did this until she was in first grade and I no longer had Fridays off. By then Billy was born and he became my cookie store date. By the time we had Dan and he was old enough, he and I went to the cookie store every Friday until he was in school five days/week.
The kids grew up, as kids do, and I eventually had to work five days a week. I always missed those trips to the cookie store where I could sit with one of my children and give them my undivided attention and we would talk about whatever they wanted to talk about. Starbucks wasn't around then so it was basic coffee and cookies and nothing fancy. When my mom visited me, she would also come with us. I miss my mom's visits more than I ever thought possible.
This week, I have been lucky enough to spend a lot of time with our sweet grandson Desmond. I have been taking him for walks every day - first in the morning with Jack the dog, who walks protectively right next to the stroller, and then later on in the day to the park where we swing on the swings and play on the slide. I slide down the slide with him even though there are a bunch of young moms staring at me disapprovingly - or maybe they are jealous cause I, at my grandmotherly age, can slide down the slide without breaking any of my "fragile" bones - and enjoy it.
Today I thought I would take Des for the usual walk to the park. But I wanted to do something different and I suddenly remembered....it's Friday and Desmond should get his first trip to the cookie store. So we went to Pierre's Bakery and I got him the biggest chocolate cookie they had. We shared it and he wore more of it than he ate. It just made me so damn happy to take that sweet little boy in the stroller to the cookie store and not have anything else in the world to do that would be more important. How lucky is that?
Some things in life are just meant to be. Even if they seem unfair. I am so glad to be able to spend time with Desmond and so lucky to have a good relationship with all our kids. I figured I would be working till Des was at least 4 and then I could spend time with him, but I have been able to spend much of his first year watching him grow and learning how to become a grandma. I am lucky that Scarlett trusts us to watch him all day and that she and Billy realize the importance of grandparents in his upbringing. Des is one lucky kid because he had a lot of family on both sides who love him and enjoy spending time with him.
I feel so close to my own mom when I am around Desmond. I couldn't relate to her so much as a mom when I became one because I could only imagine and be grateful for all the things she did for us when we were growing up. However I saw the love she exhibited with my children and the sheer joy she felt at spending time with them...like when she came out for Kseniya's first birthday and pushed her 6 blocks uphill to visit me at work. And how she stayed with her when Billy was born and came and visited us and helped me with so many things from washing walls and learning how to make french braids. I wish I could talk to her about being a grandma and tell her what a good one she was and how I now understand how cool it is to have your job just be to play with your grand kids and just to love them. I understand her sadness every time she left and her excitement when we were coming to visit her - infrequently as it was. She taught me a lot about being a grandma. I wish she was here to see Desmond and be a great grandma. I wish my mom in law Jeanne could also enjoy him - and my dad and father in law too.
I would not trade the past year for anything - despite it's ups and downs. Time with loved ones and growing babies is more important than anything. .
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