or not....
During my usual run through the neighborhood in the early morning, when I approach other runners, I usually say "hi" just to acknowledge the bond we share or at least that I feel, with these fellow humans, toiling away like me. I irrationally, I suppose get offended when they don't answer. When this happens, I usually say, sometimes loud enough for them to hear "....or not!".
Like me, these anonymous and non communicating runners probably have their I pods on and didn't hear me - "Turned on and tuned out" was what we called it in the 60's - but then it meant turned on by some mind altering substance. Now it is "Tuned in and tuned out" I guess. Why should I get offended by this lack of a greeting? I don't even know these people and they don't know me. Maybe I yearn for the simple "hi" which sometimes is enough to give me encouragement to make it the rest of the way. Or maybe my sometimes iffy self esteem needs the "hi" to feel accepted and my existence confirmed? When will I learn it isn't always about me and the lack of a returned "hi" does not equate to "I hate you, you dumb old fat bitch".
Come to think of it, I am not just this way when I am out running. I want people to acknowledge me when I wave, when I say "good morning" or when I make some comment, no matter how trivial. Like everyone else, I want an "atta girl" for a job well done. Just at least give me something to let me know that I exist. I want it to be about me sometimes cause I want to feel noticed.
Anyway last Sunday when I was walking with my friend Sid, we came upon two guys on bicycles. I said "hi" to the first one and he responded in kind. The second elderly guy (probably my age) said "hi" and probably didn't realize that I meant the first "hi" to cover both of them. As he rode by, I heard him say ".....or not!".
So I am not the only one in this world who appreciates a greeting from a fellow runner, worker or anyone making their way in this life, known to me or not.
Like me, these anonymous and non communicating runners probably have their I pods on and didn't hear me - "Turned on and tuned out" was what we called it in the 60's - but then it meant turned on by some mind altering substance. Now it is "Tuned in and tuned out" I guess. Why should I get offended by this lack of a greeting? I don't even know these people and they don't know me. Maybe I yearn for the simple "hi" which sometimes is enough to give me encouragement to make it the rest of the way. Or maybe my sometimes iffy self esteem needs the "hi" to feel accepted and my existence confirmed? When will I learn it isn't always about me and the lack of a returned "hi" does not equate to "I hate you, you dumb old fat bitch".
Come to think of it, I am not just this way when I am out running. I want people to acknowledge me when I wave, when I say "good morning" or when I make some comment, no matter how trivial. Like everyone else, I want an "atta girl" for a job well done. Just at least give me something to let me know that I exist. I want it to be about me sometimes cause I want to feel noticed.
Anyway last Sunday when I was walking with my friend Sid, we came upon two guys on bicycles. I said "hi" to the first one and he responded in kind. The second elderly guy (probably my age) said "hi" and probably didn't realize that I meant the first "hi" to cover both of them. As he rode by, I heard him say ".....or not!".
So I am not the only one in this world who appreciates a greeting from a fellow runner, worker or anyone making their way in this life, known to me or not.
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