cranky old guys
I like old people. But every once in a while I run into one who is so caustic and mean that I cannot help but yell cranky things back at them. I don't like cranky people whether they are men or women, young or old. Cranky people suck the good day right out of you.
When I say, "run into them" I mean this pretty literally Most of the cranky old guys I have encountered have been while I was out running. The worst one was when my youngest son was about eight years old. He accompanied me on my run on his bicycle, along with our dog Bailey. This was one time that I had forgotten my poop bag and Bailey decided to do his business right in front of a house where an old guy was just getting into his car to drive off somewhere. I remember that the car was a typical old guy car (OK I am stereotyping) - a big Cadillac. His wife was already in the car. Before Bailey was even finished pooping he went on a tirade. He looked so nice at first, that I was shocked to see him turn into a maniac with bulging forehead veins, spewing out nasty green shit in the form of unoldguy like swear words. I almost expected his neck to spin 360 degrees.
"Your Goddamn fucking dog is always pooping in my yard" he said. Actually this was the first time my dog had pooped in this location and the first time I didn't have a bag.
"I'm sorry. I forgot my bags. If you will give me a plastic shopping bag I will clean it up" I said.
This seemed to incite further rage in him "Pick it up with your God Damn hands" he said". He was literally shaking his neck wrinkles with rage by this time and it scared me but mostly it hurt my feelings. "I'm not giving you anything" he added with such malice that I thought he might be an enemy I had forgotten about or never knew I had.
I had never been talked to this way and to my horror, I burst into tears. This didn't move the guy. My young son, who had never seen me cry, was afraid too. "I'll go home and get a bag, mom. Don't cry", he said, as he peddled his sturdy little pre-doctor legs back home.
More obscenities were thrown at me by this angry evil wizened man. His wife sat motionless and meek in the car - not offering or maybe not daring to speak up. I bet he beat her too - if not with his fists, with his words. She didn't even dare look at me.
All I could come up with was "You must be a very unhappy person to talk to me this way, and you better hope my son doesn't hurt himself hurrying home on his bike".
This set him off on another tirade, "I am to happy" he screamed at me in defense of his mood but pretty much cementing my opinion of him. I did almost start laughing - because it seemed absurd that he was defending his happiness with his meanness.
"I feel sorry for your wife", I threw back at him.
Dan came back with the bag and we cleaned it up while the man continued to swear and get closer to having a stroke - and God help me, I was sort of hoping he would get stricken with something to shut him up. In fact, I wanted God to show up and smite him on the spot. Or at least strike him with erectile dysfunction. I don't think Viagra was even invented then.
Dan kept trying to comfort me as we continued the ride/run. I never forgot that man's rage though and wondered what he really was upset about? Years later my kids told me that on trick or treat night they went up and put rotten apples on his doorstep. While I should not have condoned this behavior - I did! Payback is sometimes sweet and especially when it was my kids sticking up for me.
Yesterday my friend and I were running on a beautiful morning on a trail that is a bike/runner/walker trail and has two lanes. A lone bicyclist was approaching us. He was what I would classify an old guy but I bet he was my age. Only his meanness aged him ten years. As he got closer to us, he threw up his arms and said, "What the hell are you girls doing? Jesus Christ, move over!" There was plenty of room for him to go around us as the entire other lane was open.
"You had plenty of room" I screamed.
"Asshole" my friend yelled at him.
"Share the trail, you don't own it" I added nastily. I know, it would have been better if we ignored him but we couldn't help it.
He didn't realize it but he actually helped us through the next few steep uphills.
"I bet his wife just kicked him out of his house and told him he needed to get some exercise", my friend said. "Or maybe she just kicked him out because he is so cranky".
"I bet he has no friends, " I added. "and I hope he doesn't have a dog because he would probably kick it".
"We should have shoved him over the cliff" my friend said. Okay we both realized that was a little drastic. I also wished erectile dysfunction on him. Freud might have something to say about this I am sure.
The adrenalin that surged through us made us run fast the rest of the hilly route home. We needed this because we had run about 12 miles already. We discussed how this much anger probably came from something totally unrelated to us. We were there and the guy was ticked about something so he took it out on us - it wasn't really about us at all. We knew we should not have reacted to it. Maybe he had a bad day - maybe his wife ran off with a cowboy and his pickup broke down. Maybe he had had an erection for 4 hours as a side affect of Viagra. I don't know but in the end we felt kind of sorry for him for being so angry and using up negative energy on such a pretty day. And we felt sorry for his wife and his dog and any other creature he might see.
I feel sorry for anyone that carries around such anger. I do believe cranky people are very unhappy people. Luckily there are more nice people in the world. I need to make more of an effort to not let the cranky ones poison my day.
When I say, "run into them" I mean this pretty literally Most of the cranky old guys I have encountered have been while I was out running. The worst one was when my youngest son was about eight years old. He accompanied me on my run on his bicycle, along with our dog Bailey. This was one time that I had forgotten my poop bag and Bailey decided to do his business right in front of a house where an old guy was just getting into his car to drive off somewhere. I remember that the car was a typical old guy car (OK I am stereotyping) - a big Cadillac. His wife was already in the car. Before Bailey was even finished pooping he went on a tirade. He looked so nice at first, that I was shocked to see him turn into a maniac with bulging forehead veins, spewing out nasty green shit in the form of unoldguy like swear words. I almost expected his neck to spin 360 degrees.
"Your Goddamn fucking dog is always pooping in my yard" he said. Actually this was the first time my dog had pooped in this location and the first time I didn't have a bag.
"I'm sorry. I forgot my bags. If you will give me a plastic shopping bag I will clean it up" I said.
This seemed to incite further rage in him "Pick it up with your God Damn hands" he said". He was literally shaking his neck wrinkles with rage by this time and it scared me but mostly it hurt my feelings. "I'm not giving you anything" he added with such malice that I thought he might be an enemy I had forgotten about or never knew I had.
I had never been talked to this way and to my horror, I burst into tears. This didn't move the guy. My young son, who had never seen me cry, was afraid too. "I'll go home and get a bag, mom. Don't cry", he said, as he peddled his sturdy little pre-doctor legs back home.
More obscenities were thrown at me by this angry evil wizened man. His wife sat motionless and meek in the car - not offering or maybe not daring to speak up. I bet he beat her too - if not with his fists, with his words. She didn't even dare look at me.
All I could come up with was "You must be a very unhappy person to talk to me this way, and you better hope my son doesn't hurt himself hurrying home on his bike".
This set him off on another tirade, "I am to happy" he screamed at me in defense of his mood but pretty much cementing my opinion of him. I did almost start laughing - because it seemed absurd that he was defending his happiness with his meanness.
"I feel sorry for your wife", I threw back at him.
Dan came back with the bag and we cleaned it up while the man continued to swear and get closer to having a stroke - and God help me, I was sort of hoping he would get stricken with something to shut him up. In fact, I wanted God to show up and smite him on the spot. Or at least strike him with erectile dysfunction. I don't think Viagra was even invented then.
Dan kept trying to comfort me as we continued the ride/run. I never forgot that man's rage though and wondered what he really was upset about? Years later my kids told me that on trick or treat night they went up and put rotten apples on his doorstep. While I should not have condoned this behavior - I did! Payback is sometimes sweet and especially when it was my kids sticking up for me.
Yesterday my friend and I were running on a beautiful morning on a trail that is a bike/runner/walker trail and has two lanes. A lone bicyclist was approaching us. He was what I would classify an old guy but I bet he was my age. Only his meanness aged him ten years. As he got closer to us, he threw up his arms and said, "What the hell are you girls doing? Jesus Christ, move over!" There was plenty of room for him to go around us as the entire other lane was open.
"You had plenty of room" I screamed.
"Asshole" my friend yelled at him.
"Share the trail, you don't own it" I added nastily. I know, it would have been better if we ignored him but we couldn't help it.
He didn't realize it but he actually helped us through the next few steep uphills.
"I bet his wife just kicked him out of his house and told him he needed to get some exercise", my friend said. "Or maybe she just kicked him out because he is so cranky".
"I bet he has no friends, " I added. "and I hope he doesn't have a dog because he would probably kick it".
"We should have shoved him over the cliff" my friend said. Okay we both realized that was a little drastic. I also wished erectile dysfunction on him. Freud might have something to say about this I am sure.
The adrenalin that surged through us made us run fast the rest of the hilly route home. We needed this because we had run about 12 miles already. We discussed how this much anger probably came from something totally unrelated to us. We were there and the guy was ticked about something so he took it out on us - it wasn't really about us at all. We knew we should not have reacted to it. Maybe he had a bad day - maybe his wife ran off with a cowboy and his pickup broke down. Maybe he had had an erection for 4 hours as a side affect of Viagra. I don't know but in the end we felt kind of sorry for him for being so angry and using up negative energy on such a pretty day. And we felt sorry for his wife and his dog and any other creature he might see.
I feel sorry for anyone that carries around such anger. I do believe cranky people are very unhappy people. Luckily there are more nice people in the world. I need to make more of an effort to not let the cranky ones poison my day.
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