so what have you been doing?
"What have you been doing now that you are retired?" This is the second most common question I get asked by people. The first question is usually "Why did you leave a job you have had for 35 years? Aren't you too young"?
I feel guilty that I can't say things like "well I am volunteering every day and am going to go on a medical mission to Chile next week" or "I have started that trashy novel I have always wanted to write" or "I have cleaned my entire house, started cooking gourmet dinners and remodeled the basement" or "I have started my own hospice business" or "I have found a way to achieve world peace". However, there hasn't been any daytime TV and I feel good about that.
This is what I have been doing. I run any time I want but mostly in the mornings. It is wonderful to be able to take my time afterward and sit around, read the paper and drink more coffee. Sometimes I treat myself to a hot chocolate with Baileys at 10 in the morning just because I can! Not too often though. I have been lifting weights twice/week and doing yoga twice per week. I had a free month pass to a club that had great yoga classes but I am not a health club joiner and besides, with about a third of the income I used to have, don't want to spend money on one. We have a nice big room in the basement with a weight bench, a small TV/DVD player for my yoga videos and also a bosu ball and a exercise ball. I do my yoga with Rodney Yee videos. He is always complementary and knows when I am holding my neck muscles too tightly and am not breathing right. "Breathe into your strong legs" he tells me. I am learning how to make the breathes go exactly there. Mostly though I am exhaling when I should be inhaling but I am getting there. This increased energy and the loss of so much stress hormone has contributed to a 5 lb weight loss and better fitting pants. Oh and I am doing some body spring cleaning...got one of those detox kits to get all the bad stuff out of my system!
I have read a lot of books - Ivan Doig, Louise Erdrich , Jhumpa Lahiri, and an old Eric Segal book called "Doctors". Eric Segal wrote "Love Story" which you might remember. I saw the movie in college and remember how the heroine died of leukemia with her hair intact and mascara and lipstick on. Imagine my disappointment when I saw how people with leukemia really died back in the late 70's when I began my nursing career. No mascara and usually no hair. Certainly no lipstick. I am now reading Zeitoun by Dave Eggers. Having two English majors in the family means that there are a lot of good books around without me having to buy any.
I have taken up knitting again and have started a crusade to bring back the chook (see a previous blog). So far I think I have made about 8 and will continue to make a few more. I also have been getting patterns for free on line and planning to make other things.
Maybe all my kids will move home so I can finally be a stay at home mom. It is nice to be able to really listen to what they tell me when they call or when I see them, without distractions of work....and I have the luxury of sitting with Desmond, my grandson, and rocking him and not worrying about anything else but savoring his sweet spirit (did I really say that?). It's nice to spend more time with my spouse and so far, we haven't driven each other more crazy than we already are. We are lucky in many ways and we know it.
It's not easy to cut off 35 years of work just like that. I keep playing the "shoulda coulda woulda" game and up until this week, have had dreams about work. I will focus on the good I did and the difference I made rather than the mistakes I made. I hope others will do the same thing. I worked with a lot of great people and I miss them. Life is too short though to have regrets and I am slowly letting go of them. It was time and as hard as it is/was it is for the best.
I do feel lucky to be able to spend more time with people who need me. Maybe this will be my career- and maybe in a few months there will be the perfect part time job for me. Maybe not.
It's not a bad life at all. Just different.
I feel guilty that I can't say things like "well I am volunteering every day and am going to go on a medical mission to Chile next week" or "I have started that trashy novel I have always wanted to write" or "I have cleaned my entire house, started cooking gourmet dinners and remodeled the basement" or "I have started my own hospice business" or "I have found a way to achieve world peace". However, there hasn't been any daytime TV and I feel good about that.
This is what I have been doing. I run any time I want but mostly in the mornings. It is wonderful to be able to take my time afterward and sit around, read the paper and drink more coffee. Sometimes I treat myself to a hot chocolate with Baileys at 10 in the morning just because I can! Not too often though. I have been lifting weights twice/week and doing yoga twice per week. I had a free month pass to a club that had great yoga classes but I am not a health club joiner and besides, with about a third of the income I used to have, don't want to spend money on one. We have a nice big room in the basement with a weight bench, a small TV/DVD player for my yoga videos and also a bosu ball and a exercise ball. I do my yoga with Rodney Yee videos. He is always complementary and knows when I am holding my neck muscles too tightly and am not breathing right. "Breathe into your strong legs" he tells me. I am learning how to make the breathes go exactly there. Mostly though I am exhaling when I should be inhaling but I am getting there. This increased energy and the loss of so much stress hormone has contributed to a 5 lb weight loss and better fitting pants. Oh and I am doing some body spring cleaning...got one of those detox kits to get all the bad stuff out of my system!
I have read a lot of books - Ivan Doig, Louise Erdrich , Jhumpa Lahiri, and an old Eric Segal book called "Doctors". Eric Segal wrote "Love Story" which you might remember. I saw the movie in college and remember how the heroine died of leukemia with her hair intact and mascara and lipstick on. Imagine my disappointment when I saw how people with leukemia really died back in the late 70's when I began my nursing career. No mascara and usually no hair. Certainly no lipstick. I am now reading Zeitoun by Dave Eggers. Having two English majors in the family means that there are a lot of good books around without me having to buy any.
I have taken up knitting again and have started a crusade to bring back the chook (see a previous blog). So far I think I have made about 8 and will continue to make a few more. I also have been getting patterns for free on line and planning to make other things.
Maybe all my kids will move home so I can finally be a stay at home mom. It is nice to be able to really listen to what they tell me when they call or when I see them, without distractions of work....and I have the luxury of sitting with Desmond, my grandson, and rocking him and not worrying about anything else but savoring his sweet spirit (did I really say that?). It's nice to spend more time with my spouse and so far, we haven't driven each other more crazy than we already are. We are lucky in many ways and we know it.
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| Me and Desmond. Is anything better than a baby in your neck |
I do feel lucky to be able to spend more time with people who need me. Maybe this will be my career- and maybe in a few months there will be the perfect part time job for me. Maybe not.
It's not a bad life at all. Just different.
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