love the questions

Having a daughter is a great thing. Having a grown daughter is like having a friend who is part of your soul. My mom, pictured to the left with Kseniya, also thought having a grand daughter was the best. This is probably the last picture of my mom and her favorite grand daughter. My mom is somewhere now, maybe in Venice with those people who kidnapped her from the hospital because they needed a grandma, wishing her grand daughter, my baby girl, a happy birthday. Sorry sis, I was my mom's baby girl till the day she died (or got kidnapped), as you will be mine even when you are 65.

Being 31 is pretty prime. You still have that nice pretty skin with no wrinkles, and no hint of an apron in site -and those cute running legs that you inherited from me, of course, although your dad has nice legs too. I know it can never be that we appreciate how good we look when we look that good - we just can't because we are more programmed, unfortunately to notice that which is wrong with us rather than the good things. Like you, I often was teased because I was short. But my momma always said "Good things come in small packages". When I was upset about the short jokes, she said "They are just jealous because you are so cute". By the time I was in college and got called "Chubby little Oj" by one of my room mates (whatever happened to you, Jean Boyce?), I didn't care so much any more.

Can't say I appreciated my 31st year. But you my sweet daughter, are so much more confident than I - and accomplished. You were brave enough to go to college on a blind date - only seeing images of Dickinson on the website until we arrived there that same day Princess Diana died - me being scared shitless to drive on the PA turnpike. But we made it any you made it and thrived. The blind date turned out pretty well, unlike most blind dates.

Sure you could have gotten in less debt if you went to college locally but I doubt that you would have been lead down the path you followed. A year in England. A post graduate year in Germany. You've lived a lot of places and have done more things than I ever thought possible when I was a college student. You should be proud. I know I am. Even if you refuse to read "Stranger in a Strange Land" and "Atlas Shrugged" I will have to forgive you!

I don't want to go on at nauseum but suffice it to say that I am and always have been proud of you. You have your own business http://thomas-printers.com/ . You actually had one before this when you were about 5, making bookmarks and selling them to anyone who came over, for a dollar. You are a good person, and you have learned to follow your bliss. You are loved by many people, including your "little brothers" who you have always looked out for - and they for you.

I am glad you will love me still when I am old and have a lacy apron, and glad that you keep me away from high waisted pants. And thanks for making me see the futility of panty hose although, when they first came out, they seemed like a wonderful invention, after garter belts! It will take a while to get me away from the tie dyed t-shirts - can't help it - I'm a child of the 60's!

So sweet sis, have a happy birthday and look forward to many more. Live in the moment - don't look too far back or too far ahead. It's all good. And...we will take that road trip we've been talking about soon. I will leave you with the following quote you shared with me once - I don't know much about poetry but this is one of my favorites.

Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.
Rainer Maria Rilke - Letters to a young poet