Wisconsin, dreams, Tulane graduation and other things
I guess I am too picky about what I write in here - I have great, profound thoughts, but am too tired, or ....I wait too long and they go away, left only as cryptic comments written on my running journal pages, supposedly to remind me or spur me into writing something that the two or three people who read my blog will say "Wow! She's a genius!".
Anyway, a lot of stuff has happened since April when I last documented. Bruce and I drove back to WI to sort through things in his parent's home, which will be sold soon. Both parents are in nursing homes so we were there for the first time without one or both of them being around to greet us. The house seemed to shrink in size as we looked in dresser drawers and closets that we were not privy to before. As I went for what might be my last run in that beautiful, small town, I thought about how much junk we all have and how someday our kids will have to go through it. Still we took some treasures for ourselves and for our kids. We visited my father in law who seems to be resigned to his fate and sleeps most of the time. Still he has a sense of humor and looks for some recognition in his wife's eyes when we take him to visit her. He gets none but holds her hand as she babbles. It bothered me that their bird feeders were empty and the cuckoo clock was silent and then gone, taken at our urging, by one of Bruce's brothers. We drank my father in law's whiskey and looked at old pictures and memories. Bruce tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to make me an old fashioned, like his dad used to drink. We stayed up till 1 am and then got up to an empty house without his parents coming in to join us for breakfast.
While I was there I had dreams about my dead grandmother and that we had neglected her for months and I was trying to give her a bath in her kitchen sink. I dreamed of my dead father too and I don't know what it meant. I had this same dream in a somewhat different fashion a few weeks later.
The trip to Wisconsin was a one week trip that took us through Wyoming, Nebraska, Iowa, Minnesota, Wisconsin and one day in Michigan to visit my mom. She is fine but her world is also shrinking. My brother is going to kill her or my sister with his disease of alcoholism that makes him selfish and a taker. I fear he is beyond all earthly help. He is beyond caring.
Anyway, a lot of stuff has happened since April when I last documented. Bruce and I drove back to WI to sort through things in his parent's home, which will be sold soon. Both parents are in nursing homes so we were there for the first time without one or both of them being around to greet us. The house seemed to shrink in size as we looked in dresser drawers and closets that we were not privy to before. As I went for what might be my last run in that beautiful, small town, I thought about how much junk we all have and how someday our kids will have to go through it. Still we took some treasures for ourselves and for our kids. We visited my father in law who seems to be resigned to his fate and sleeps most of the time. Still he has a sense of humor and looks for some recognition in his wife's eyes when we take him to visit her. He gets none but holds her hand as she babbles. It bothered me that their bird feeders were empty and the cuckoo clock was silent and then gone, taken at our urging, by one of Bruce's brothers. We drank my father in law's whiskey and looked at old pictures and memories. Bruce tried, albeit unsuccessfully, to make me an old fashioned, like his dad used to drink. We stayed up till 1 am and then got up to an empty house without his parents coming in to join us for breakfast.
While I was there I had dreams about my dead grandmother and that we had neglected her for months and I was trying to give her a bath in her kitchen sink. I dreamed of my dead father too and I don't know what it meant. I had this same dream in a somewhat different fashion a few weeks later.
The trip to Wisconsin was a one week trip that took us through Wyoming, Nebraska, Iowa, Minnesota, Wisconsin and one day in Michigan to visit my mom. She is fine but her world is also shrinking. My brother is going to kill her or my sister with his disease of alcoholism that makes him selfish and a taker. I fear he is beyond all earthly help. He is beyond caring.
Last weekend, our youngest son graduated from Tulane. Our two other grown children met us there and we had a great family vacation. For four days, Dan showed us around New Orleans and we ate good seafood and drank too much and laughed and enjoyed the feeling that you can only get from those who know and love you as well as your immediate family who can put up with you even after too many drinks, especially one aptly called a mind eraser. It was perfect weekend that made me feel that we had perhaps been good parents who were payed back by having good children. Now as his siblings before him, Dan must find his way, and make car payments, rent and insurance payments. It is what we all have done.
In between these two trips, I visited my friend Bob only to find his wife mooning him and singing "Chitty chitty bang bang". Life, while always good, is sometimes sad, but always funny if you look at it in a certain way.
In between these two trips, I visited my friend Bob only to find his wife mooning him and singing "Chitty chitty bang bang". Life, while always good, is sometimes sad, but always funny if you look at it in a certain way.
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