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Showing posts from February, 2010

invalid

So it is 5 weeks of not running so far. Jack the dog looks at me every morning to see if I am going to pick up the crutches and hobble to the bathroom. He then sighs and goes to lay back down. I notice my fabulous calf muscles turning to mush, like my brain. Despite knowing how lucky I am, I find myself reduced to tears easily - I don't have the running therapy but maybe it is also because it is almost a year since my mom died and I am gripped with the grief that sneaks up on me when I least expect it....like when I have to go talk to my boss. I noticed that invalid is also in-valid. Hmm. Just like if you take the word therapist apart - you come out with "the rapist". The rapist of the mind is maybe a good definition of a therapist but invalid is not such a good term for one with a broken leg. I still feel valid. I still need validation. But mostly I just need to go for a good long run to start feeling like a human again and to be able to deal with the er in February and

start from where you are

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My friend Sid (84 years old), which is not really important but inspirational and also the same age within one week, that my dad would have been if he had not up and died at 81, brought me over a book called "The right to Write". The first thing it suggested was to just write three pages from where you are at the time and to not worry about if it made sense or if it was (were) grammatically correct. So where I am is sitting here with a fractured fibula, slowly mending, with 7 screws (typically 6 but one more for good measure) and a plate, stitches out, mild infection for which I am taking Keflex (when I remember) after having watched 4 episodes of "Lost". I am wondering if I should take a lortab before bed because my leg is starting to hurt just a little bit. I have a new scooter. I got a scooter to scoot around on at work but it is too big. Since, when you are injured, people do nice things for you like send you a bunch of cards, flowers, prayer shawls, food